Saturday, January 31, 2009

Zack is such a JERK!

OK, so I was drunken blogging. Who doesn’t occasionally let one fly in a moment of deep despair? Not over the economy, nor the fact that no one seems to want to buy our shirts, but because I have to work with such a JERK!

There are not enough tubes on the interweb to contain the volume of words I have in response to your slanderous posts. Yes, I am on the metaphorical ledge, eating all the peanut butter snacks I can get my hands on. You of all people should know I only do it for attention. I am the numbers guy. I would have to eat roughly…1 million(?) peanut butter cracker sandwiches to remotely increase my chance of coming face to face with Salmon Ella.

But how dare you attack my stature, in case you missed it, Microsoft is laying people off. I could find another screen printer. Don’t worry about being surprised by a reduction in force, if Hiphazard decides to lay anyone off, I will be the first to know… and you will be the second.

Friday, January 30, 2009

You people are so cruel!

Man I don't know if I can take all of this criticism, constructive or otherwise you people are harsh! I guess I understand why Steve's still standing on the edge of that skyscraper with a fork sticking in his eye. I just can't finger out why he hasn't jumped yet. Yo Stevo, I'm back. I got my coffee and you're a go pal. Here's a couple more for you to ponder on your way down... Z

Thursday, January 29, 2009

That explains it!

I just found out that Steve was drunk-blogging again.
He swears it was it was only one beer but from the mournful, dejected,
stick-a-fork-in-my-eye tone that he struck in that first post I'm guessing
three. Or maybe one of those 62oz cans that looks like a mini keg.
Regardless, when you're only four and half feet tall and 84 pounds it
just don't take much. Stevo, buddy, a little control.


Here are a couple of new designs for your critic...
Go easy folks Steve's got one foot on the edge already
and I want to have a fresh cup of coffee for the spectacle.
Damn! They've closed the nearest Starbucks. Hold on Steve.
Don't jump 'til I get back. I really don't want to miss this! Z

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Jesus? Come to Pappa is what I'm thinking...

Yep, it's the "writting" by which you'll be able to tell us apart!
Another way to separate us is by the fact that my cohort invokes
"God" whereas I invoke "Dog".
Now don't be fooled folks, he sounds like we're all lined up on the
top of some skyscraper somewhere getting ready to take the leap
if we don't make some certain sales quota... In actuality, he's the
only one on the edge. I'm down here on the sidewalk with a piece
of chalk marking out a big "X".
Because I know that when you good people go to check the balance
in your bank account (assuming you don't bank with WaMu...
in which case you have no account,) you'll decide those
$60 Abercrummy and Filtch Tees are complete crap
and our Hiphazards start looking pretty damn good at less than 20 bucks!
Now... back to my day job on Wall Street!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Hello? Is there anyone listening?

I have to be straight with you. This blog is a final act of desperation. Hiphazard is a t-shirt company in dire straights. My God I could bore you to tears with details of our history... our auspicious beginnings, the lean years... crap, it is all crap. The truth is, we kicked it off, then went back to our day jobs and did nothing to really make it happen. Well, it is time to "come to Jesus".

Look, a company is not a building. It is not an idea. It is not even a product. A company is people and all the creativity and talent they have to offer. Hiphazard is no exception. So, what better way to know if we have something to offer the world than to put it out here for the world to see.

Here is our goal. We want to come up with 10 new designs for shirts each week. They will be featured on our site,, but they will be unveiled here first. You may get some rambling, some pontification, maybe even explanation. Our hope is that no one will cry (except maybe "foul") that some of you will laugh, and at least one of you will be offended each week. Hang in there, bear with us and for Christ sake, BUY SOME SHIRTS.